A cornerstone of their plan was that I share the car with my beloved wife. Treasure of my treasures, joy of my joy, and... co-profiled driver of Serena. But... but...
It's not that I don't trust her. And frankly it isn't like she doesn't deserve her very own Tesla. The woman works hard and struggles much with the needy little lifeforms I often affectionately think of as "those monsters of ours". No, the desire is purely selfish. I want it all.
Alas, all those well-intended lectures about "sharing" were coming back to haunt me. The children's conspiracy to get warp-speed rides to piano lessons and whooshed deliveries to scout meetings meant that Serena would not be waiting for me in the garage some mornings.
Four days after delivery... the moment came.
It was time to set up her Driver Profile in Serena.
You can see the ACTUAL MOMENT I ceased to be the sole driver. What you can't see (really) is her name because the picture kind of stinks. Not sure what happened, really. I think the screen protector I installed (on a car.. a SCREEN PROTECTOR on a CAR. I can't decide if that is futuristically cool or geekily nerdy. Perhaps both?) caused some kind of strange rainbow thing to happen in the photo. No matter-- that's her name. That's the moment. We were now a threesome.
Truthfully I'm happy to share the car. No really! I just have to keep repeating that to myself until it's true, I believe it, and the unicorns bring me more pixie dust. I'm happy to share the car. I'm REALLY happy to share the car. By sharing the car, my wife and I will have another joyful thing in our lives together and we can do that self-congratulatory smile and head nod to each other that all married couples have. Granted most of them do it when their kids get an award or a home improvement project goes perfectly according to plan (so I've heard-- I don't think we've ever had either happen), but now we'd be able to smugly nod at each other as if to say "yeah, baby...we got THIS together and it's great!"
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